Maintain Sobriety With A Daily Tenth Step

Written by DeShawn McQueen on Thursday, 07 February 2013. Posted in Ten Step

February 07, 2013

Most recently I had dinner with a couple; both the husband and wife are mentors and friends of mine.

Although I did not meet them in Alcoholics Anonymous ("AA") they met in AA. Today they are a happily married couple sans the children as she is in her last year of the forties, and he is in his fifties.

During dinner we were having light conversation when the topic of pro choice came up.

Aside from rape or incest I do not believe that abortion should be an option.

Keep in mind, I did not bring up this topic, my friend the wife brought it up. Needless to say, my stance was the first issue.

The second issue was that her husband, and my friend as well, agreed with me.

Never mind the fact that we were at a very nice, classy restaurant when she began to raise her voice in disagreement. She was very angry, especially for a woman who brought up the topic, and quite frankly is no longer of birthing age.

I reminded her that we were not on the Senate floor, or in court, as she is an attorney too.

Arguing with me would not change anything I told her. Go to Capitol Hill and lobby I thought. Just please don't ruin my dinner.

Rather than argue with her and make a scene, I politely told her it was just my opinion.

When she angrily insisted that we continue the discussion, I decided that I would no longer participate. Again, her husband agreed.

Instead, as she went on, her husband and I continued to eat, silently, awkwardly glancing at one another.

It would seem that grace and civility, not to mention decorum would have suggested the same for her.

In my opinion yelling and discordant banter, no matter how meritorious, is useless, not to mention unhealthy.

With that said, my part was that I ever shared my opinion on abortion in the first place. It is one of the subjects, similar to religion and voting choice, that no matter how significant an issue it is, it should not be discussed among friends as it is naturally controversial, particularly for alcoholics and addicts.

God, guide my instincts and intuition. In fact, Lord guide my every step. I trust you, wholeheartedly. Amen.


"You yearn, you go. You learn, you grow."

I Love You All, for the most part :)

Weigh in on this tenth step and lets us know what you think.

Also, if you like to see a particular scenario discussed, let us know.

Let's take 100% responsibility for our emotions.


If you or someone that you love is struggling with drug addiction or alcoholism, please call or text us. We would like to help you.

About the Author

DeShawn McQueen

DeShawn McQueen

DeShawn McQueen is a staff writer at Recovery Now Newspaper and Recoverynowtv.com, an informative newspaper that serves as a resource for persons of all stages of drug and alcohol treatment, by giving them access to relevant and necessary information so that they may live balanced and substance-free lifestyles. DeShawn graduated from Wayne State University with Bachelor of Science degrees in psychology and premedical sciences. He holds a Juris Doctors degree in law from Valparaiso University School of Law. DeShawn’s writing and research has been published in such academic journals as Behavioral Pharmacology and Pharmacology, Biochemistry and Behavior among others. He lives in Los Angeles, California.

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