Maintain Sobriety With A Daily Tenth Step

Written by DeShawn McQueen on Monday, 05 November 2012. Posted in Ten Step

November 05, 2012

1. I have a friend who I like a lot. We have quite a few things in common; that is always nice. However, this particular person always has chaos and drama in her life, something negative to discuss or talk about. I felt as if she was always dumping on me and draining me, despite the fact that she always told me that I was welcome to discuss my issues with her; I suppose I just never took her up on the offer. I like to do everything alone…..face life alone.

    a. With that said, my part was that I always saw the world through rose colored glasses and to be honest I still do. It’s a blessing in many ways. Nevertheless, many people don’t have this gift and I should not expect them to see life this way. If they don’t, I avoid them. That is not fair. In fact, if I am honest, I am fearful of negativity or being afraid. I have always preferred to face things head on, or not at all. It is not fair to expect everyone else to do that, and to discard them if they cannot.

    b. God, divorce me of my expectations of other people, not to mention fear.

2. I face situations all the time where I do things for people or with people at my expense, then resent them later. For example, a friend will ask me to see a film and although I know I don’t want to see it, I agree to see it. Inevitably I realize it was not only a waste of money, but a waste of time. I was not fair to myself nor that person who I later discarded as a friend because I was not able to set a boundary and say no.

    a. As you can see, my part was the fact that I was not only apprehensive about saying no, but that I did not say no. As well, I put someone else’s desire ahead of my own desire to do something else….it was not necessary to go out of my way to do something I did not want to do, and then later blame that person because I had an awful time.

    b. God, help me to not be dishonest, but to be sincere about how I feel and to set boundaries. God, guide me to not assume that people need me, at the expense of myself, especially when they don’t; divorce me from ego. Also, God divorce me from resentment.

Please weigh in on this 10th step. Let us know what you think.

Also, inform us of any particular 10th step subject-matter that you would like to see appear in this column.

Remember, life is difficult enough without dealing with active addiction!

If you or someone that you love is struggling with drug addiction or alcoholism, please call or text. We can help you!

About the Author

DeShawn McQueen

DeShawn McQueen

DeShawn McQueen is a staff writer at Recovery Now Newspaper and, an informative newspaper that serves as a resource for persons of all stages of drug and alcohol treatment, by giving them access to relevant and necessary information so that they may live balanced and substance-free lifestyles. DeShawn graduated from Wayne State University with Bachelor of Science degrees in psychology and premedical sciences. He holds a Juris Doctors degree in law from Valparaiso University School of Law. DeShawn’s writing and research has been published in such academic journals as Behavioral Pharmacology and Pharmacology, Biochemistry and Behavior among others. He lives in Los Angeles, California.

Comment Via Facebook

Illegal Drugs

Prescription Drugs


Custom Care