Getting clean and sober is certainly a challenge. However, maintaining long-term sobriety is where the difficulty often really lies.
As most alcoholics and addicts know, remaining clean and sober requires continuous step work if we want to keep what we have acquired as a result of getting sober.
With that being said, a daily 10th Step is one of the most practical sober tools.
I am resentful at my boyfriend because he did not call me back when he said he would. When he does not call me back I feel insecure and afraid about his love for me and his integrity, not to mention the strength of our relationship.
As stated above, my part is that I was afraid and insecure. Consequently, I ask God to remove fear and insecurity from my thinking.
I am resentful at the Starbuck’s cashier because she was taking too long to service me. The fact of the matter is that not only do I dislike waiting because I need to get things done, but I also prefer not waiting because important people do not have to wait…..I suppose I prefer to see myself as important.
My part is two-fold, (1) I am too impatient and intolerant. It was not her fault that she had five orders ahead of mine. God please make me more patient and tolerant.
(2) I was afraid that the cashier did not respect me or that she did not see me the way I prefer to see myself, as important. God, divorce me from fear and self-pity, not to mention my ego.
Those were just two examples of a proper 10th. Feel free to comment and share your perspective on the 10th step.
Now you try!
10th Step Guidelines
Start with a suitable prayer, e.g:
"God, please help me review my day. Please grant me the willingness to see what you would have me see, in the light you would have me see it: free from morbid reflection, fear, obsessive guilt, and dishonesty."
The following guide was extracted from Alcoholics Anonymous (pp. 84-86):
1. Was I resentful?
5. Do I owe an apology?
6. Have I kept something to myself which should be discussed with another person at once?
7. Was I kind and loving toward all?
8. What could I have done better?
9. Was I thinking of myself most of the time?
10. Or was I thinking of what I could do for others, what I could pack into the mainstream of life?
11. After making our review we ask God's forgiveness and inquire what corrective measures should be taken.
At all times we continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop up we:
1. Ask God at once to remove them.
2. We discuss them with someone immediately.
3. And make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone.
4. Then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone we can help.
If you or someone that you love is struggling with alcoholism or drug addiction, please call or text us. We want to help you.
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