January 25, 2013
Growing up as an African American in very traditional Irish Catholic Caucasian family caused me quite a bit of confusion. Actually, for quite a while I thought it was the root of my alcoholism, and prescription pill addiction.
With that said, eventually I came to the conclusion that it was not so bad.
I realized how blessed I was to be adopted as an infant, and raised by parents who loved me and afforded me an incredible life with amazing opportunities.
Notwithstanding that I was incredibly self-absorbed, entitled, with an insatiable appetite for more……I was a spoiled dilletante, with a chip on my shoulder.
My part was that I focused on everything that I thought was unfair (1) that I was an African-American raised in a Caucasian family, (2) with driven, highly successful, highly critical parents who did not comprehend shortfalls, (3) accepted no excuses, (4) sheltered me so much that I was naive and childlike well into adulthood (5) pretended my learning disability, not to mention my homosexuality did not exist, (6) was not particularly nurturing and affectionate although they provided for me very well financially [private/boarding schools, gated community, best clothes, travel] and so on.
The fact of the matter is that they loved me in the best way they could, provided me with an incredible work ethic, diligence, instilled values in me, shaped my character, and sheltered me from so much that I did not quite comprehend it until I was an adult.
For instance, I have never once tried an illicit drug, not even marijuana, and not because I did not want to, but because of the values that my family instilled in me. In many ways, looking back, I consider that a blessing. With my addictive personality, I can only imagine where I would be if I had!
Today, as I gradually reestablish familial ties, I pray to God to help me to be forgiving, tolerant and patient, all the while focusing on everything I have to be grateful for, leaving the rest in the past where it belongs.
"Everyone (good and bad) that comes into my life helps me choose between the body and soul; to give me free will."
God Bless us all.
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