For many addicts and alcoholics forgiveness can be difficult. I once described it as cryptonite! I incorrectly believed that forgiveness would be the death of me, that it would somehow destroy me. I had so many resentments that they consumed me and interfered with every aspect of my life.
With that said, how could I forgive being wronged I thought?! How would he or she know the significance of his or her behavior?! I thought, it's my job to hold on to "this", nurse it and keep it alive.
Well, that type of thinking is long gone! I no longer consciously hold on to resentments, and not because I aspire to be like Mother Theresa.
To be honest, I choose forgiveness because somehow forgiving gives me freedom. As said in Alcoholics Anonymous, I become "happy, joyous and free".
Nevertheless, it took me a while to get to this point; a lot of trial and error. Trial and error that you can avoid by surrendering.
Surrender your resentments to your higher power and ask him to remove them from you.
Today, I have more energy, I am not as stressed, I am more connected to a power greater than myself, once again I can trust my instincts and intuition, and I can look in the mirror and love what I see. As well, it seems as if more good things happen to me.
I think it has something to do with the concept of "like attracts like." If you are happy, more things, people and circumstances that make you happy will be drawn to you. Likewise, resentments only make you feel bad. Thus, you draw more negative things to you.
The difference between forgiving and not forgiving has to do with your next drink of alcohol or your next drug. If you forgive, there is less likelihood that you will need a drink of alcohol or a drug to alleviate a bad feeling.
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